“Being happy never goes out of style.” ~ Lilly Pulitzer
1. Never Getting Around To Your Goals.
“Procrastination is a crime that only leads to sorrow. I can stop it any time. And I think I will tomorrow.” What goals are you pushing off to the future? Stop making excuses and start taking steps towards fulfilling your dreams. You will be happier if you take action towards your goals because you will be more inspired about your future as you awaken each morning.
2. Living Out A Life That Is Less Than You Are Capable Of.
Are you tolerating a mediocre life out of a fear of failure or a fear of rejection? When you avoid taking risks on your own behalf, your world shrinks and so does your self-confidence. Stop playing it safe and take some chances towards becoming your best self. Review options for enrolling in a few classes toward an educational goal you’ve put off for too long. Bite the bullet and join that gym you want to attend but are worried about how you look. Do what you must to get to where you want to be.
“The only thing that will make you happy is being happy with who you are.” ~ Goldie Hawn
3. Undermining Your Potential.
Are you your own worst enemy? Are you constantly engaging in negative self-talk that is full of criticism and hesitancy? You are capable of doing so much more than you can probably imagine. Start speaking words of hope and ability. Thinking negatively is a choice. Don’t do it. You may not believe your own words of encouragement at first but if you will stick with speaking positivity into your life; they will become easier to believe.
4. Sticking Your Head In The Sand.
Are you avoiding your problems? Face your problems or whatever it is that is holding you back. Stop pretending they aren’t there and do something about overcoming them. Nowadays, help is available at the click of a button or a phone call away.
“When it rains, look for rainbows. When it’s dark, look for stars.” ~ Unknown
5. Pretending That You Don’t Have Flaws.
Everyone has flaws, but it’s up to you whether you’ll give them the power to keep you from doing what you want. Instead, take your flaws, find your strength in them, and make them work for you. Your flaws can be seen as something bad or the things that give you a unique advantage to a situation. As a young therapist, I came to realize that many may have failed to reach someone before me but I brought something to the situation (my uniqueness) that the others might not have had. Step into your uniqueness.
6. Being Too Uptight.
Are you too serious? Do you feel like you have to be in charge or control of every situation? Some things cannot be controlled and you can quickly become frustrated and angry. It is better to remember the only thing you can truly control is your own response to the things going on around you and within you. To have self-control of yourself is a much more reliable source of happiness than trying to control everything around you.
“Every day is a new day.” ~ Carrie Underwood
7. Refusing To Look In The Mirror.
Nothing great has ever come from blaming or accusing others. The way to really be happy is to be accountable for your actions and responsible for the consequences that come with them.
8. Worrying Too Much About What Others Think.
Why do so many people want to be something they are not? What would it take to be happy with who you are and celebrate your gifts and talents? Don’t compare yourself to anyone else. Make a decision on who you want to be and move towards that image.
9. Not Living In The Present Moment.
Do you waste a lot of your time thinking about things from your past that stir up feelings of guilt, shame, sadness or resentment? Are you worrying about things that could happen in the future? You cannot change the past. And you don’t know what the future holds for you. The trick is to stay in the present long enough to truly figure out what makes you happy. What memories can you create today? What choices can you make to start creating happiness? This present moment is the only thing you can actually do something about.
10. Complaining Instead Of Doing Something.
Are you one of the many people who believe that complaining is actually the same thing as doing something about your dissatisfaction? IT’S NOT. Make a concentrated effort not to complain for twenty four hours. If you mess up; start over. Then try to go two days and then three and so on. When you catch yourself complaining, take a moment to look around you in a spirit of thankfulness for the things you have. Be thankful for your health, your spouse, your children, your job, etc. A lot of people would gladly like to be in your shoes.
11. Expecting The Worst To Happen.
Are you fooling yourself that it is better to expect bad things to happen so that if they do; you are prepared? Unfortunately, this is some of the worst thinking a person can do because your outlook determines your experience. So if you are expecting negative things to happen, you can actually draw these types of experiences into your life. Expect the best of yourself and others.
“Embrace the glorious mess that you are.” ~ Elizabeth Gilbert
Mark Webb is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in private practice at Oakwood Counseling Center in Valdosta. He is the author of How To Be A Great Partner and How To Argueproof Your Relationship. Read more of his articles at www. TheRelationshipSpecialist.com